A friend of mine asked me the other day if the process of blogging/journaling (of letting so many others read my private thoughts) was helpful in the healing process. My answer was a resounding yes. I know that I am surrounded by many, many people who love me and would lend an ear or a shoulder whenever necessary.  But, I don't always explain myself well verbally.  Writing down my thoughts?  I feel a deep sense of relief when I click that orange Publish button.  I've said all that's floating around in my crazy head, and my head..and usually my heart...feel better. This is me. This is my real life . Sometimes, the weight on my shoulders is too much to bear. Sometimes, my hopes and dreams are dashed away by the reality of the situation. Sometimes, I feel like God is so far away.  Too far to call out to.  Too far to hear me.  Too far to step in. Too far to make things right. I make mistakes.  I say hurtful words.  I think awful though...

"May the God of Hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him so that you may overflow with hope."  Romans 15:13. Since the day we left the hospital (it played in the car as we drove away) just over two weeks ago, I have clung to and listened to and sung along with one song over and over and over. I've NEVER had a song touch my heart and match my circumstances as clearly as this one does. Sometimes, it hurts to listen to it.  It reminds me yet again of our loss. But most times, I smile as I hum along. Because the singer speaks (sings) truth, and the lyrics play across my mind and soul so vividly. My favorite part of the song? The tag at the end. "Jesus come and break my fear, Awake my heart and take my tears, Find your glory even here, When the hurt and the Healer collide." I need those things. I need Jesus to break away the fears that I find myself falling into multiple times a day. I need Him to rip away the fear that the same...